Characters: Ianto, Jack, Owen, Eleven, Amy, Rory, Tosh, Gwen
Pairings: Jack/Ianto, Amy/Rory, implied Eleven/River, past Jack/Doctor, past Ianto/Lisa
Summary: Working for Torchwood Cardiff means dealing every day with aliens, time travellers, annoying co-workers, and worst of all, tourists. A day in the life of someone who'd rather be somewhere else.
Spoilers: TW: goes AU from canon after "Adrift," DW: up through "Let's Kill Hitler"
AN: Written for reel_torchwood for the prompt: "Clerks," assume offensive humour and worse (e.g. necrophilia) in keeping with the movie.
"I'm not even supposed to be here today."